The AJ Chronicles: 21 June 2024
Unexpected gift, Father’s Day, tasks and distractions, the only video of my dad, climbing a ladder, visiting my aunt, unused gym membership, plus my recent Medium stories
![A collage of four photos: three Father's Day cards, a gift, a plate of biscuits, and pieces of mortar on a concrete garage floor. A collage of four photos: three Father's Day cards, a gift, a plate of biscuits, and pieces of mortar on a concrete garage floor.](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd468f564-8b13-4372-af51-36460ee20b86_2500x1900.heic)
Sections
a. Recent Moments
b. Medium Stories
a. Recent Moments
Unexpected gift 🎁
Father’s Day 🍽️
Time-consuming tasks and distractions 🕘
The only video of my dad 📼
Climbing a long ladder 😧
Visiting my aunt 🍪
My father-in-law’s unused gym membership 🏊♂️
1. Unexpected gift 🎁
Last week, I mentioned how my neighbour had fallen in his side driveway. At the time, he seemed annoyed that nobody had noticed for a while.
The following day, his wife came to the door with a gift-wrapped box of chocolates for me. It was completely unexpected!
I wish I’d answered the door, but I was slow because I assumed it was a cold caller, so my son went instead.
Later, my youngest son saw me with that box of chocolates. It caused momentary confusion, as you’ll see in the next part.
2. Father’s Day 🍽️
When my children were younger, Stephanie would buy Father’s Day gifts and cards for them to give me. The transition to doing those things independently has been a little rocky, but they’re now in their late teens, and it was lovely that they made the effort.
A few days earlier, my eldest son asked me for ideas. One of my suggestions was a T-shirt to replace the one I damaged recently when doing odd jobs at Stephanie’s house.
My youngest son gave me a box of chocolates identical to the one my neighbours gave me. (See above.) When he saw me with them the day before, for a moment he thought I’d found his hiding place and helped myself to his gift one day early!
For once, Stephanie did not stay over at my house last weekend because she had to attend a university open day with her daughter. On Father’s Day, the two of them arrived with several gifts. (They tend to get a bit carried away!)
Unfortunately, my youngest son had a shift at McDonald’s, so my Father’s Day lunch only consisted of four of us.
My eldest son thoughtfully suggested placing some of the flowers we’d got for his late mum’s anniversary at the crematorium for my dad in the afternoon. It meant a lot to me that he thought about the grandad he never knew.
3. Time-consuming tasks and distractions 🕘
I took my youngest son to his yearly diabetes eye screening at a new and unfamiliar location. The signage could have been better, but it’s easy once you know, as they say.
Luckily that took little time. However, the same can’t be said for sorting through sentimental clutter such as more of my children’s old schoolwork. After dedicating one day to that, I sat down to write the next day, only to be distracted by a commotion outside.
The house across the road has undergone a total renovation during the last year. I thought it was all over, but they have started working on the back garden. That has involved huge lorries coming every day or two and offloading vast quantities of building materials using a crane.
It has been distracting and I kept worrying my son’s car would get damaged because our road is narrow.
4. The only video of my dad 📼
In the 1980s, my eldest sister arranged a birthday party for her young daughter. The whole thing was recorded on a 3-hour videotape, and she gave copies to various family members.
In the 1990s, I borrowed my mum’s tape and made a copy for myself. In the 2000s, I copied it to DVD. I tried two different machines and kept both sets of DVDs. One had better sound, and the other had better colour. Eventually, I ripped the DVDs to my computer.
The quality is not great, thanks to all those conversions. Given that it’s the only video footage of my late dad, I plan to send the VHS tape away for professional conversion.
Before doing that, I asked the younger of my sisters if she had our mum’s tape because it would be of higher quality. (She and her boyfriend cleared our mum’s house 15 years ago.)
Much to my surprise, she didn’t know anything about it. Sadly, our mum’s copy of the tape must have been thrown out.
(If only I were on speaking terms with my eldest sister. She may still have the original tape or a digital conversion of it.)
Hopefully, the conversion company will do a better job with my tape. Even if they don’t, I’m glad to have some video footage of my dad. It’s also been strange seeing how the 19-year-old me had similar mannerisms to my youngest son!
5. Climbing a long ladder 😧
In my younger years at work, I was made to climb ladders in dangerous situations. (See Weird Workplace Stories 6: “Fun” With Ladders on Medium.)
Despite all the risks, it gave me the confidence to work at height when I moved in with Jane in the 1990s.
Over the last 30 years, it’s become increasingly rare for me to climb anything higher than a stepladder. Fourteen years ago, I installed an extractor fan very high up and attached a vent on the wall outside. I’ve also replaced the bell boxes on my alarm system.
The longer it has been, and the older I get, the more uneasy I feel. If the ladder were securely bolted to something at each end, I’d run up and down it like a monkey. It’s the fear of it moving that gets me.
A few days ago, another piece of mortar fell off my chimney, thanks to a shoddy roofer three years ago. I could not leave it sitting there in the gutter, so I got the ladder out and retrieved it.
I got my eldest son to hold the ladder at the bottom, and it was quite bendy/wobbly. The transition between the first and second sections was the worst bit.
But I did it. Phew!
Three years ago, rather than replacing the flaunching, the dodgy roofer thought he was a cake decorator and cut corners by adding a thin layer of mortar over the existing stuff. Hopefully, what remains is still watertight.
6. Visiting my aunt 🍪
Last week, I forgot to mention we’d visited my 101-year-old aunt. It was a fairly ordinary visit in most ways.
My aunt is a stickler for timekeeping so I do my best to arrive exactly on time. Unfortunately, Stephanie’s neighbour had kept her talking, so she was late getting to my house.
It was needlessly stressful, and I drove faster than usual. Somehow, we arrived a few minutes early!
Stephanie took some cakes for my aunt, and I consumed too many biscuits as usual.
My aunt said her great niece’s daughter now has a well-paid job but refuses to give her mum a penny towards her keep. She threatened to move out and live free of charge at her grandmother’s house.
Although I don’t charge rent, I’m lucky my eldest son is happy to pay his share of the household bills.
7. My father-in-law’s unused gym membership 🏊♂️
My eldest son has been helping my father-in-law change to a cheaper mobile phone contract. That was when he spotted an unrelated payment on his bank statement of over £50/month that wasn’t needed!
It was for gym membership. My father-in-law used to go for various things, including swimming. He also took my youngest son there for swimming lessons.
I worry about my father-in-law’s memory because he said he’d not been for 40 years! The place wasn’t even built 40 years ago! And he’d taken my son swimming in the last 10 years.
Luckily, his bank recovered 18 months’ worth of payments, and he gave my son a share of the money.
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Alan
b. Medium Stories
The titles below are links to my recent Medium stories. I’ve included quotes to give you a taste.
Thinking About My Dad on Father’s Day
Reflections and cherished memories
He must have been exhausted, but he always found time for me and there was never a moment when he sent me away or made me feel like I was bothering him.
How My Long-Term Relationships Started
June Prompts, Day 15
My first relationship did not end through choice. Instead, it ended when my wife Jane passed away 11 years ago; she was only 45 years old.
* * * * *
The short version is that our friendship turned into a romantic relationship — but it was more complicated than that. Another widow also had feelings for me which led to a messy situation.
Sweets and Lollipops Bring Back Many Childhood Memories
June Prompts, Day 19
I was usually armed with a single ten-pence piece, and my choice was often a mixture of Black Jacks and Fruit Salad. They were 1/2p each in the 1970s, and it seemed like quite a haul to return home with 20 sweets.
Where to find Alan AJ
I hope that video footage of your father will be in good condition when you get it back- that's something you don't want to lose.